Palmtree Contemplations

Over the past few months I have been increasingly surprised and blessed by the men in my life. On a walk today, I started listing all the lessons I have learned from them. Here are a few. 1) Listen (and turn your phone off).     One of my friends in particular has demonstrated this to me again and again. I'll never forget the first time he sat down and really listened to me. His phone went off three times, but he didn't even look at it. He gave me his full attention. Now, whenever I am listening to someone I turn my phone off too. 2) Don't Worry About Money.     I learned this lesson from a friend over the summer. I told him how worried I often feel over my lack of money. He looked at me and said, "You know, I've just decided not to worry about it. God will handle it." He is right. After a year and a half of seeing God provide money over and over again, I have decided that it is best not to worry about it. Instead, I can be excited to see how God is goin

        I couldn't believe it when I heard it. It was impossible, implausible, and absolutely ridiculous to think that one of my best friends, one of the most non-emotional people in the world, was actually in love. She called me a few days after I found out. We had barely spoken our hellos when I said, "Well?"      "Well, what?"      "Oh, come on. Tell me everything. When did this happen? How did this happen? The last time we talked you were just as determined to stay single as I am. Tell me everything!"      Slowly and with great detail the story came out. I lay on my bed, listening, laughing, and nearly bursting with joy because I could hear that sound in her voice: the sound of a woman abandoned to love. There's a question I have been asking ever since I first heard that sound:      "What is it like?" I am always asking people this question. A lot of people find it amusing, probably because they know and can not imagine not know

      For so long, now, I have been filling myself with everything I want, and everything that I believe will fill me. I don't want that anymore. It's hard to say what has changed. I think it started when I realized that nothing really satisfies me. Nothing. The most beautiful piece of music, the sweetest conversation, and the greatest view in the world do nothing to heal this ache in my heart for I don't know what. Then, I don't know when, I started asking myself, "Is this all you really want? Is this all there is?" The answer is no. I have spent too long cutting myself off from the source of life, the only One who can heal me of this ache. I am not worthy, I know. Neither am I capable of giving God back everything He deserves. But this I do know: when I look at Him and I say, "I am an empty vessel, fill me with Your desires," He does not hesitate. This life I live will be an exploration of those desires.         Here's to the adventure of walk