The Middle

And so I have arrived,
After a few months that blur and melt in my mind,
Like watercolors on a wet page.

This is not where I stop,
But it is where I rest,
For a moment, a simple moment
To watch the sweet sun move an inch.

(Pause)

The trees all have clothes,
   where once they were naked.
The grass has grown up emerald,
   with tulips and daffies for jewels.

My heart has softened
   enough to be hurt again.
My soul has gained glasses,
   the better not to be fooled.

Music keeps me awake,
   giving light to the shadows,
Melodies new and old,
   spilling out like beads from a broken chain.

So, I have arrived,
Or have I?
For the moment of sun gazing is gone,
I stand blinking like a baby,
Thoughts rushing in the quiet.
I crossed a bridge I didn't see,
And stand on the other side, considering.

So, I arrived,
     Only to leave again.
So much for the seeking,
the asking,
the dreaming,
the planning,
the cooking,
the sleeping,
the practicing,
and the dancing.

Was it all worth it?
To work and work
      for a moment I could not see
      an inch of sunlight I will never have back?

A bead rolls towards me on the floor,
Then another, and another,
All humming and glimmering,
Little singing stars at my feet.

Was it all worth it?
I think so. 
I hope so. 
I know so.